


Friend of Foe

by Laitie



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-26
Updated: 2018-01-19
Packaged: 2018-10-24 02:29:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10732284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laitie/pseuds/Laitie
Summary: Batley Fluff, basically.





	1. Chapter 1

She didn't want it to happen. God knows she didn't want it to happen. Not that she knew it was going to happen. In fact, she was quite certain in the fact that it could never happen. Not even a thought that had ever crossed her mind. But it happened. And now she was stuck sitting there in shock staring at the cave wall across from her, the man she had spent the night with still asleep beside her. He still had his mask on, and she was tempted to try and take it off. But something about the events of last night made her decide not to. Last night.

It began like a normal evening. Her puddin' was finishing the dinner of lemon-and-chicken she had made for him. They couldn't afford much more than chicken these days. Her puddin' needed to do another heist. But until then, she was quite happy with their life together, anyway.

She knew how he usually felt after eating. And she was certainly feeling in need of some attention and satisfaction. So, as he finished his last bites, she snuck up behind him and placed her hands on his shoulders, rubbing gently. "Hey, puddin'," she said seductively in his ear. "I think it's time to rev up your Harley." She left a kiss just behind his ear, right where he liked it.

Despite the perfect circumstances, he pushed her away. "I've got work to do," he said. "Go do something else."

But Harley wasn't going to give up. She knew he could be stubborn sometimes. She walked back up to him. "C'mon," she said. "I've got the handcuffs ready."

He shook his head and pushed her away again, standing. "I told you, Harley, I've got work to do. Now leave me alone!"

She tried a few more times before he left the room. Once he was gone, she sat there at the table, defeated. With a sigh, she stood and cleaned up. Since her puddin' wasn't in the mood for playing, she needed something to do. So she put on her black-and-red diamond shoes and made her way out into town.

She was thinking that maybe Selina would like some help stealing a necklace or something when she heard a commotion coming from her left. It sounded like it was coming from the laboratory she knew was down there. She turned and went to investigate. Sure enough, it was the laboratory. And Poison Ivy.

Harley grinned at the sight of her good friend. She was commanding a large green creation with vines that had completely destroyed the building and were now grabbing at the police officers that were uselessly shooting at it. Sure, the shots did some damage. But not enough that couldn't be regrown in a second.

"Ivy!" she called, waving. She made her way toward the commotion. Police officers pounced on her. The first came at her from the side, so she flung her arms out hard to knock him out. With her arms out, she was ready to do some tricks. She flipped and bounced through the crowd of police officers, making sure to hit each one at least once with a hand or foot. Her attacks looked like accidents, but she didn't falter.

Finally, a vine wrapped itself around her and picked her up. She giggled as she flew through the air, her arms out. The trip ended beside Ivy herself.

"Hello, Harley," Ivy said.

"Hey!" Harley greeted. "What's goin' on here?"

"They were using plants to experiment with," Ivy said. "So I'm just doing some . . . 'damage control.'"

Harley grinned. But that grin melted to a scowl.

"What's wrong?" Ivy asked.

Harley nodded behind Ivy. "Batbrains," she muttered. Ivy turned and frowned.

Batman was flying through the air. Well, OK, falling. He was headed straight for Ivy and Harley. If the little brat-I mean Robin was around, he couldn't be found. Yet.

"Oh, he's going to ruin everything," Ivy complained. With a sigh, she sent a vine up to knock Batman out of the way. He cut right through the vine as it came. His weapon the girls couldn't make out in the darkness. "He's hurting my baby!"

"I'll get 'im," Harley said. She tumbled and flipped her way over toward him so that he landed right in front of her. Their faces were an inch apart.

"You two are going to stop this right now," he warned, his voice low.

"No, we're not," was all Harley said before throwing the first punch. He caught it in his hand, but Harley was prepared. She immediately kneed him in his well-armored stomach. She ended up in more pain than he. He twisted her hand in his, and she yelped before pulling away forcefully.

She back-flipped away from him, making sure her foot caught his chin. Finally! She got a hit in! But she knew that was a small one for him. This man made of iron or whatever. He came after her, and she jumped back again. That was when a vine quickly wrapped around Batman and lifted him into the air. Harley grinned at the sight, but not for long. Batman took his weapon from before-a bat-shaped knife, apparently-and cut into the vine until he dropped down. Instead of going after Harley again, he started cutting more vine-arms off.

"Ivy!" Harley called, looking over at her friend.

"NO!" Ivy shouted. The vines attacked, but they were no use as Batman pulled out a bigger knife. Harley was about to go after him when Ivy called again. "Forget it! The damage is done! I'm going home!" The vine-monster began to shrink. Harley and Batman ended up falling through the air down into the mess of what was left of the laboratory. Batman pulled out his grappling hook and shot it into the air. It caught on another nearby building and he was able to swing towards Harley. He caught her and held her close as they swung. Not that he had to. She had grabbed him for dear life.

Once they were close enough to the ground, Batman let go of his grappling hook and landed on his feet, holding Harley bridal-style in his arms.

"You saved me!" she announced happily. She wrapped her arms tighter around him in a hug as she brought her face up to leave a kiss on his lips.

They froze. Harley bit her lip as she stared into his bright blue eyes. Slowly, she leaned in. She didn't know what she was doing. She wasn't really thinking about it. All she knew was that Batman was hot and she wanted him right then and there. Their faces were an inch apart.

"I think there's a warrant out for your arrest," Batman said. But Harley was unfazed.

"Then why don't you punish me for that?" she asked softly before kissing him again. After a moment, she felt him return the gesture, and she grinned to herself.

He pulled away.

"Think you can walk on your own?" he asked gruffly.

She pushed out her lower lip. "I don't think I can," she whined pathetically. He rolled his eyes at her. She leaned up to his ear. "You'll just have to carry me in your big, strong arms," she whispered. She ran her hands along the armor on his upper body, cursing the stupid armor for making it harder for her to seduce him.

"What are you trying to do?" he asked.

"What does it look like?" she replied softly. She leaned in and kissed him yet again. Each kiss seemed to be making it harder and harder for Batman to resist. She could already tell his breathing was begging to struggle as he kissed her back. The kiss grew deeper and deeper before Batman finally pulled away.

She tried to take hold of his breastplate. "How do you take this stupid thing off?" she asked with a soft giggle. He shook his head.

"Not here," he said, his voice low.

She reached up and placed a hand behind his head, bringing her lips to his once again.

Before she knew it they were in the Batcave. She could see nothing but dripping rock and bats, but she didn't really care. All that was important was Batman. And he seemed solely focused on her, too.

"I don't know how to take this stupid stuff off," she whispered with a giggle, pulling at the armor on his arm. He chuckled and held her close as he quickly guided her hands to removing his armor. They shared more passionate kisses as the clothes-and-armor pile grew and grew beside them. Finally, nothing was left to take off but Batman's cowl. But she kept that. The mystery kinda turned her on.

They spent all night together, and now she was awake and naked beside him, staring at a leaky old wall of a cave. She turned and stared at the man. For he was just a man. That was certain, now. She leaned over and supported herself over him with her hand on the other side of his head. Her free hand traced the hard lines on the bottom of Batman's face. Her finger touched his cowl. She examined it, playing her fingers along it. She grabbed it and looked back at him. He was staring up at her.


	2. Chapter 2

Footsteps echoed down the cave walls. Any thoughts of removing Batman's cowl vanished as fear of getting caught replaced them. She jumped off of him and threw her clothes on. He must have had the same fear, for when she finished dressing, she turned to him and saw that he was already back in his full armor.

"How'd you—" she began to ask, but she was cut off by him throwing his cape over her head. She felt him grab her and drag her through the stone tunnels. "Hey!" she complained, though quietly as she remembered those footsteps. "Where are you taking me?"

"Out of here," he growled.

"Oh." So basically, they were on the same page. She stopped her struggling and ran with him. His grip on her loosened from a dragging one to a guiding one.

They ran until she thought she was going to pass out. Which couldn't have been very far considering she had a heavy, black cape over her head. But it must have been far enough, because he finally stopped her and pulled off the cape. She looked around, quickly recognizing the alley they were in. At least she knew where they were and could get back home. God knew she couldn't remember anything about how they got to that cave last night.

She grinned at him. "See you again soon?" she asked.

He was silent a moment. Thinking it over, she figured. It had been a great night.

"No."

She couldn't help the pout that form on her lips. But he ignored it. He turned and wandered off. She knew better than to follow. So with a sigh, she, too, turned and made her way to her puddin's.

"Where the Hell were you!?" was the greeting Joker offered her as she walked in the door. She blinked and stumbled in from her surprise. "I had to make my own breakfast! I burned the damn eggs!"

"I'm sorry," she said softly, closing the door behind her.

"Damn right you are!" he said, coming over to her and slapping her across the face. "Where were you!?"

"With Ivy," she lied easily, thought her voice shook for the slap. She brought a hand up to rub at the pain.

"And you didn't think to come home in time for breakfast!?"

She bit her lip. "Uhm…No?" He reached up and slapped her again. The force of it turned her face the other way, and she kept it there. She struggled to hold back tears. Crying would just make it worse. Her puddin' hated girls crying.

"What the Hell were you thinking!?" She remained silent. "Damn you, Harley! Just look at me! My clothes are a mess because I can't find a damn thing in this house! I'm starving and you just go off with your girlfriend doing whatever the Hell you want without a single care in the world! You're so damn selfish!" She doubled over as she suffered a punch to the gut. That was when she couldn't pay much attention anymore.

She was in bed later that day. Still healing from the beating. Joker had left not long after it. To do what, Harley didn't really know or care. All she knew was that he was right. She was selfish. She shouldn't have gone out last night. It was selfish of her to go out and seduce Batman and—oh, God. She seduced Batman. She cheated on her puddin'! And not just plain old cheated. But with his arch nemesis! She was such an awful human being!

She had to tell him. It would kill him. He would be so hurt. But it would hurt him worse not to tell him. That was it. When he showed up, she was going to tell him.

The door opened. She wrinkled her eyebrows together and looked up to see none other than her puddin' standing there with a huge bouquet of flowers. Red and black roses, her favorite. All thoughts of Batman vanished and she grinned at him. He grinned back and walked in.

"I'm so sorry, Harley," he said, sitting on the edge of the bed. She sat up and took the roses, inhaling their sweet scent. "I let my temper get the best of me again."

Harley smiled up at him. "It's OK, Puddin'," she said. "I still love you, temper or no temper." She reached over and hugged him, accidentally crushing the flowers between them. He patted her back.

"So, we're good?" he asked. She nodded. "Good," he said. He leaned in and left a kiss on her lips. His voice got low as he said, "Because I've got a crazy afternoon planned for you."

She smirked and narrowed her eyes at him. "Oh?" she asked. He nodded and placed the flowers on the bedside table so he could have better access to her body. He ran his hands up and down it, leaving kisses on her lips and neck. She shivered in pleasure. "Oh, Mistah J."

The following weeks went by as normal. Harley almost completely forgot about the Batman incident to the point where she figured she could just keep it a secret. It wasn't like it was ever going to happen again, right? There was absolutely nothing more that she had to worry about. Just work on keeping her puddin' happy. And that's what she did.

That is, until she was walking back from the store late one night on a last-minute errand and found Batman standing right in her path. She looked up at him and stared. Finally, she frowned. "What do you want?"

"You," he said. But he didn't sound as harsh as usual. In fact, he sounded kind of seductive. She looked around them to discover that they were all alone in the street. Looking back at him, she realized she was starting to get excited just thinking about it. Alone, with Batman, again. Aw, shit. She was in trouble. She dropped her bag and ran into his arms, pulling him down into a deep, passionate kiss.


	3. Chapter 3

This time, Batman was ready. He had prepared a mattress in an abandoned building for their night together. Afterwards, he held her close, and she curled into him. She’d never been treated with such...gentleness before. Sure, she enjoyed the power-play and roughness that she shared with her puddin’. But she also enjoyed this new way of doing things. The care he took and the attention he gave her. 

She turned her head up to see him staring at her. She grinned and pulled him into another deep, passionate kiss. “You certainly know what you’re doin’,” she whispered. He gave a small, contented grunt in return. “Still so unwilling to talk?” she asked.

His fingers traced imaginary lines on her bare back. She shivered as his gentle touch tickled her. But she didn’t ask him to stop.

“You let your actions talk for ya, huh?” she noted with a grin. He leaned down and kissed her again.

Every kiss they shared lit up a flame inside her. The very idea of sharing another long, magical night together excited every bone in her body. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer. And closer. She couldn’t get him close enough.

And then he pulled away.

He sat up.

She gazed up at him, her eyes wide. Her mouth still slightly puckered from their kissing.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“This is wrong,” he said.

She almost gasped. Somehow, she had never really imagined it possible for batbr--I mean, Batman to be so unsure with himself. Especially when it came to morals. She sat up on her knees and touched his shoulder.

“It feels right,” she said. “So it must be.”

“Do you really think that?” he dared, not looking at her.

She froze and pulled away. No, no he was right. She was Mistah J’s girlfriend. She was cheating on him. And enjoying it. She frowned and sat back on her heels. 

“You’re not the woman you make everyone think you are,” Batman said. She blinked and looked up at him. “And The Joker doesn’t deserve you.” With that, he stood and began re-applying his armor. 

“What do ya mean?” she asked. He didn’t respond. She fell silent as she watched him dress. When he headed for the window, she called, “Wait!” 

He paused, but didn’t look at her.

“When will I see you again?” she asked.

He was silent for a long moment. Finally, he said, “Think about what I said. You’ll know how to reach me when you’re ready.”

“But--” But he was gone. Out the window without a sound. Without a trace. She sighed and looked over at her clothes.

I had better get dressed and head home, she thought. Don’t want another repeat of what happened last time. As she gathered her clothes, she debated on what she was going to tell her puddin’. She couldn’t tell him, she decided. Besides, Batman had basically said they wouldn’t do it again until she said so. So if she just never tried to reach him...

Her brow furrowed when she put on her jeans. There was something in her pocket that hadn’t been there before. Carefully, she pulled it out.

It was a small, circular object with a button on it. The button was a bat. Oh. She stared at it a long moment before slipping it into a zipper pocket of her purse. She zipped the pocket closed and reached for her shoes.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry it took me SO UNBELIEVABLY LONG to post this up. I had the whole outline all this time, but I couldn't figure out how to actually accomplish it. I FINALLY figured it out!!!~   
> This is the last installment. Idk what else to do. Give me ideas?

It was New Year’s Eve, and Joker had the biggest bang ever planned for it. A bomb full of his laughing gas right in the middle of the city, where everyone would be gathered to greet the new year. The preparations were all in place. Now they just needed to wait.

It was cold, and Harley clung to herself, holding her red-and-black winter coat closer to her body. I snowed lightly. Her teeth chattered as she watched the giant, LED TV Screen counting down the minutes to the new year. Five minutes left. In five minutes, she would whip on her gas mask and this whole crowd would be full of deadly smiles. 

There was a scream.

And another.

Oh, no. 

Something was wrong.

Harley ran to investigate. She raced towards the screaming, shoving her way through the crowd that was almost too busy cheering on the musical performance to notice the screaming.

She pushed aside a screaming woman to reveal none other than her puddin’, storming right for her.

“YOU!” he screamed. He reached her and took hold of her arms, shaking her violently. “YOU SCREWED UP THE WHOLE THING!”

“W-what d-did I-I d-do?” she asked, trying yet failing to keep her voice steady as he shook her.

“You loaded the gas in wrong!” he cried. “Now I have a dozen dead henchmen in that building!” He stopped shaking her just to slap her across the face.

“I-I’m sor--” She never got to finish her apology. Her puddin’ was hit from the side and was sent flying a foot away. She saw a flash of black go after him. She blinked and looked over. 

Her puddin’ was struggling to get up off the snow-capped ground before Batman reached him. He made it just in time, jumping out of the way just as Batman went to land a punch in his gut. 

The henchmen jumped out of the gasping, screaming, watching crowd. They converged on Batman, who fought through them easily enough. But Harley’s eyes went to The Joker, who was climbing atop a nearby statue, gun in hand. 

Oh, no. No, no, no. He was going to shoot Batman! But she--

She what? Loved Batman? No, way. She loved her puddin’. She couldn’t....

He was at the top of the statue. Batman was too distracted by the henchmen to see The Joker taking aim, his finger ready on the trigger.

“No!” Harley cried. She raced for him, reaching her arms out.

BANG.

Everything stopped. Pain shot through her right arm. She screamed and cradled it close. She looked up to see her puddin’ staring at her, mouth half-open in bewilderment. His shock lasted just long enough for Batman to reach him and land a punch in his gut. The Joker fell from the statue, cradling his belly. 

And just like that, it was all over. The police had finally pushed through the crowd and were surrounding The Joker. They didn’t seem to notice Harley yet. 

She sniffed, realizing there were tears in her eyes. She sighed and looked away. Batman had disappeared, too. 

She turned and began making her way home, fingering the button in her coat pocket. A shadow crossing over her made her stop. Looking up, she saw him. Standing there, staring at her. She pulled out the button with her left hand. She pressed the bat symbol. A small light accompanied by a beeping noise went off on Batman’s utility belt, by his left hip.

They stood there a moment as the device went off, staring at each other in the road. The snow came down heavily, now. The area was clear as everyone had run away at the sound of the gun. The only noise was the beeping.

The LED TV screen was still counting down the seconds. 3...2...1...

Before she knew it, she was in Batman’s arms, and they were kissing.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I came up with more drama. But I really need comments, please. I really need to know your THOUGHTS, not just "ooh, that was nice." Thank you.

That night, Batman took Harley Quinn to a small apartment building. It was like any other apartment building. Not too fancy, not too run-down. But to Harley, it would be quite nice.

“This is your place,” Batman said after they had climbed through the window.

“What?” she asked. 

He reached into a pocket in his belt and pulled out a key. “This is your apartment,” he said. “I have friends taking care of the rent for now. Until you get back on your feet.”

“You can’t be serious,” she said.

“I don’t joke,” he replied grimly, holding the key out to her. “This is your chance,” he said. “Don’t blow it.” he turned.

“Wait!” she said. He paused. “Don’t ya....Don’t ya wanna stay....a minute?” 

He glanced back at her. “Why?” he asked.

She shrugged and looked down. “I dunno,” she said. “I don’t wanna be alone, I guess.” She looked up, but he was gone. She sighed. Just like him to leave her in her loneliness. 

She turned and went to the door, switching on the light. It was roomy, already furnished with a couch and two armchairs in the middle of the room, surrounding a T.V. 

She shook her head as sleepiness began to overtake her. She supposed it was time to go to bed. Figure things out in the morning. She flicked off the lights and went searching for the bedroom.

To her surprise, he was there. Batman, standing by the bed in the darkness, staring at her. She grinned.

That night was the most magical night they’d ever had.  
\----  
She didn’t hear from Batman at all the following days. Disappointed, she set to work looking for a job. Not many good-to-do companies would be too keen on hiring Joker’s ex-girlfriend, but she kept her hopes high. Wayne Enterprises often helped people in low periods of their lives, and she applied to a few positions there. She still had a college degree. Even Joker couldn’t have taken that away from her.

It was a month and a half later when she got the two phone calls that would change her life forever. She was in her living room, looking up job opportunities in the newspaper when her phone rang.

“Hello?” she answered.

“Hello, may I please speak with Harleen Quinzel?” a male voice asked.

“Speaking,” she said.

“I’m Hector Warrington from Wayne Enterprises. I’m calling to congratulate you! You got the job! Would you be ready to start tomorrow?”

“Oh, yes!” she said, struggling not to jump up and down from excitement. “Thank you! I’ll be there tomorrow!”

“Great!” Hector said. “9am sharp.”

“Yes, sir!” she said.

“Thank you. Have a good day.”

“You, too!” she said before hanging up. Now, she did jump up and down, laughing gleefully. She couldn’t wait to tell--

Well...if she didn’t see him, how was she going to tell him? She frowned. Then her phone rang again.

“Hello?” she answered.

“Hello, is this Harleen Quinzel?” said a female voice.

“Yes.”

“This is Rita from Dr. Norris’ office.”

Her heart dropped.

“Yes?” she asked.

“Congratulations! Your tests have come back positive. You’re pregnant!”

She dropped the phone, her face construed into horror. No. She couldn’t be.

“Ms. Quinzel?” the phone was saying. “Ms. Quinzel?”

After a moment, she finally bent down and picked up the phone. “Hi, yeah, sorry,” she said.

“I wanted to make sure you heard about all our programs intended to help you through this wonderful time in your life. We--”

“Oh, no, thank you,” Harley said. “I’ll, uhm, I’ll look into it later.”

“OK,” Rita said. “Feel free to call with any ques--”

Harley hung up. She slowly slid to the floor, covering her face in her hands. How could they have been so stupid?

And how was she going to tell him?

Should she tell him?

He had to know.

She had to tell him.

But how?

As luck (good or bad) would have it, Batman showed up that night. It was late, but Harley was still wide awake. She was in the kitchen, drinking hot chocolate as she tried to wrap her head around having a real, normal job and being pregnant. 

“Heard you got a job.” His voice made her jump, and she peered into the dark living room. She could barely see his outline by the window. 

“Yeah,” she said with only a hint of excitement.

“Good,” he said. 

“Batman...” She hesitated.

He waited.

“I need to...Need to...tell you something...”

He waited some more.

“I got another call today...” she said.

Silence.

“I...I skipped my last two periods...”

The tension rose. She couldn’t bear it.

“I’m pregnant...”

Silence.

“Batman?” She looked up. He had come closer. Just a little. She stared at him. Waiting for a reaction. Any reaction.

“Are you keeping it?” he asked.

She nodded.

“All the finances will be taken care of,” he said. 

“What about you?”

“What about me?”

Harley sighed. “The baby should know its father.”

“That’s not possible,” he said.

“Why not?”

“You know why not.”

“Batman,” she complained. “The baby--”

“Anything you need,” he said, coming closer, “or the baby needs. You’ll just need to ask.”

“We need you.”

“Besides that.”

She sighed. “Please,” she said. “I can’t do this alone.” Tears began falling from her eyes. He came close and held her as she cried.

“You can do this,” he said after a while, when her crying had calmed. “You’re a strong woman.”

“I need your help,” she whimpered. 

“Look at you,” he said. “You got out of your relationship with The Joker. You found your own job. All on your own. You can do this.”

“A baby is very different,” she informed him.

“I know,” he said softly. He leaned down and left a soft kiss upon her lips. “But I know you can do it.”

“Batman, please.”

There was a beep from his utility belt. It was met with a moment’s silence.

“I have to go,” he said.

“Please help me,” she went on.

“It’ll be fine.” 

“Batman--” But he was already turning and heading for the window. “You can’t do this to me!” she yelled, tearful, as he climbed through the window and disappeared into the night. She covered her face and wept.


End file.
